#Life instinct#Marriage#Muslim

#blogoftheday…

I just attended and everbody was invited to a marriage ceromony commonly called as Nikaah in Muslim community and was held in  Masjid(not so common nowadays). I thought I should write it as a blog and share the cool experiance I had. To be honest the marriage or so called the marriage ceremony lasted for about half an hour.

here is one of the examples of simple marriage.

pairs

Simple Marriage

Friday ie on 30th September our Masjid’s Imam announced about the marriage that was scheduled in the masjid after the Asr  Salah. Let me introduce to the person who were in the ven diagram of the marriage. The daughter’s father was of our locality, and were financially very sound basically they were business men. They were legitimately very capable of holding grand marriage ceremony of their daughter, MashaAllah both the parties decided the venue to be in the Masjid.

I went to the  the Masjid for Asr Salaah at 4:15 pm and, of course Masjid ie Allah’s home have a peaceful vibe that entices you completely and help one disconnect from the worldly affairs for you to meditate in the process of Salaah; its just such bliss and peaceful, shortly after the Namaaz  the Nikah ceremony started.

Verses of Quran and Hadith were recited, Naseeha were given to everyone and finally it was time for signature and stuff. The Mehr was given on spot to the bride’s father. Congratulations were given to the bride groom who is also a business man(also a Moulana I guess) dressed in white Kurta and Pajama, literally no flower garlands,  no Sehra, just plain and elegant white Kurta and Pajama ,looking fresh.

Best part: the bride is an Islamic Scholar, has memorized whole Quran; She is an Hafizah MashaAllah. (obviously no there is no point of highlighting here  filthy zahez,no baraat shraat, no give and take policy of engagement, Wallahi these are cringe onr the another level.…May Allah protect me and all Muslims from all innovations and Bidaa Ameen )(for these practicing Muslim things like this does not exist ;its non-existent).

Even though they were capable of holding dinner party lavishly, may be in a 3 star hotel  and the bride groom like coming in SUVs etc they chose the way of the Sunaah of the Prophet(SAAS) .

Let me highlight some points and I sadly have observed in my family too.

After all the ‘fixation processs ‘the program of ‘Discussion’ executes ie about Zahez and if the Larka(potential bridegroom)(obviously not all) is holding big post then; damn; the Larkiwala(from the side of the bride) is just imposed with heavy so called ‘damands’(generally speaking obviously not all).

All the process just executes,like getting big hotel, varieties  food, in short all the extravagances. During the actual Nikaah in these types of Marriages, with the ‘Rasam of Joota Chorai,gate chikai’ all the cringy stuffs ,its really, I dunno, what to say?, its just so bad. Guys if you happened to see the general Indian Muslims esp of girls’ marriage; the embarrassment is on the another level.

The fact, for those who are leaving the Sunnah of our beloved Prophet(SAAS) including the companions1 of the Prophet(SAAS) it’s a like we are ourselves are responsible for the eclipses one has from the mercy of Allah(swt) in a one’s marriage. We have to follow the Prophetic Style of marriage and as it was enacted as an example by the Sahabah and their students’ and their students’; the Marriage of Fatimah az­Zahra S.A and are some example to be followed because it has the ‘ruling’.

Notice that in Surah Room Verse 21 Allah mentions that the reason why we have spouses is so that we may find TRANQUILLITY in them and He placed between us COMPASSION/AFFECTION andMERCY. So if you are married and things aren’t quite going as stated in the ayah above then clearly something is not right. After all Allah SWT is the one who created us and he is the one who knows us best.

Many people seem to forget that the very same Allah who created us is also the same Allah who sent down legislation via revelation so surely revelation should be the FIRSTthing we turn to for answers…well unfortunately the sad reality is that for many Muslims it’s the LAST source they turn to.

Is there anyone who walked this Earth greater/more knowledgeable than the Prophet ﷺ? Is there anyone who would want to help us and provide solutions to our problems more than the Prophet ﷺ? A lot of people don’t give answers from the Kitaab and Sunnah rather they answer from their own experience and intellect (which isn’t necessarily a bad thing btw!) but the Quran and Sunnah MUST come first and THEN you come with your experiences etc.

One thing we must always remember, is that Allah created us and he also legislated for us. He knows what is best for us better than oursleves.

1Irbad bin Sariyah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: The Prophet SAAS said “whoever among you lives after me will see slot of dispute.So hold fast to my Sunnah and the Sunnah of the Rightly-Guided Caliphs who will come after me, holding on to them with your molar teeth”

(Ibn Rajab Al-Hanbali said “The sunnah of Prophet Muhammad(SAAS) consists of holding into what the prophet was upon and also what the rightly guided Khulafa were upon ,by following their speech, action and belief. All of this is what you call the complete sunnah. When the Salaf used to use the word Sunnah, they used to mean the path of the prophet and the Sahaba” )

Making marriages easy like we have in our Sunnah makes the Jina and the ill effects of being not in a marriage to zero its like a ‘sea saw effect’ for a muslim. Its actually the solution to countless problem therefore our Prophet(SAAS) urges for its Ummah to get wed locked.

Narrated by `Abdullah:

We were with the Prophet (ﷺ) while we were young and had no wealth whatever. So Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) said, “O young people! Whoever among you can marry1, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual intercourse etc.), and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power.”

1‘can marry’ here has been explained as both financial and physical ability by the scholars.
2[Sahih al-Bukhari, hadeeth 5066].

The fact that ‘Pre Marriage sins’ are getting more common is inversely proportional to marriage being not easy obviously without the extravagates. You can put it otherwise which is totally true. The solutions to all these are already given by our Prophet(SAAS) all we have to do is put into effect like how I observed that Friday.

Knowledge is the light that guides through the darkness, as Allah said”..We have made it a light by which we guide whom we will of our servants. And indeed, (O Muhammad), you guide to the straight path.

The Prophet(SAAS) said “The Prophets do not leave behind a dinar or dirham but rather, only  (leave behind) knowledge, and whoever inherits that, then that person has taken a large portion”

(Abu Daawood, At-Tirmidhi and Ibn Maajah, Al-Albaani- Saheeh).

We have to resort to Ullema(2) of our deen and get ourselves in the light of the Knowledge(it encompasses everything including the topic of marriage) and to be away from the shadow of ignorance. As our Prophet(SAAS) said in the hadith above it’s a divine legacy that we are bestowed with and is literally the only thing that the Prophet(SAAS)  left for his Ummah till the last of the Person ie till eternity and its suffices everything. We as a Muslim should push,urge and grab and  inherit (etc.) that divine Legacy.(2.Sheikh Abdur Razzaaq al Badr said: “the stars are created for three reason:

  • Beautification for the Sky
  • Signs to guide the travelers
  • Protection against the evil

These three attributes of the stars are the same for the scholars.

Just as the stars are a beautification for the skies, likewise, the scholars are beautification for the earth. Juast as the stars guide travelers, the scholars guide people to the truth. Just as the stars are the protection against the devil, the scholars are a protection against innovation and falsehood in the religion.)

May Allah guide us to The Straight path and make our marriage according to Islam and make us the seeker of Ilm with Ikhlaas. Ameen.

 

 

 

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19 thoughts on “#Life instinct#Marriage#Muslim

  1. I read this post in 2 parts! Half I read yesterday and half I read today because I told you that special concentration thing 😊
    So you were focusing on “O young people! Whoever among you can marry1, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual intercourse etc.), and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power” yesterday? 😁

    Liked by 1 person

  2. If I’ve understood you correctly, I think I agree with an important part of this post: that weddings are needlessly lavish. In my opinion, it is not money that should be showered down on weddings. If anyone is going to have anything in abundance regarding a wedding, let it be words, words that mark the importance and sanctity of the bond and partnership that is beginning. Only this and the sincere behavior/actions of the people at the wedding are what is needed to make it special. Everything else is filler, an illusion.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I know that some tension is caused between members of Muslim families who choose not to go to the wedding reception of a family member because the event itself is so overblown that it will perpetuate issues that go against important pillars of Islam. There is bred gossip, jealously, putting on airs, etc.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I don’t know about this, my sister got married last year, Alhamdulillah, pretty much according to the Sunnah,( She h
        Ad just completed her mbbs,) Do you know the pillars? , it’s generally nothing to do with this.Unless it involves Shirk, associating partners With the Creator who created the heavens and the earths. I try to keep things simple and minimal, trust me, it helps, almost every where.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Remember As Quran says Good wife gets a good husband and good husband gets a good life wife. Just be ‘Good’. That’s it, ‘try’ to follow Quran and Sunnah, simple.

        Like

    1. Yea, but the main thing in my religion, mainest (if this word exist lol) is tawheed.
      It’s can be forgiven you know, misconduct or some short coming but the, the shirk cannot be forgiven only sincere repentance can do, and this falls under Kabira gunaah (great sins) , so basically its not rigid actually it makes thing easy,

      Liked by 1 person

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